finals week

So I'm sitting in the O.C. which is fairly common place for me to do on a school day. But I am not sitting in my chair at my computer. Nope, someone apparently got here at the butt crack of dawn and chose my little nook as their place to write what appears to be a journalism article. Yeah, but it's finals week people. You can taste the excitement of being done in the air but it has a bitter after taste known as F.I.N.A.L.S. which stands for: Fuck I Never Actually Learned this Shit. I should be slightly more panicked but I started studying last week and I've been good about participating and communicating with my professors. I'm just so ready to be done for the summer though. I have soo many things already planned for it. Many of them rather exciting. Also I am going back to Disney World come August. So this lazy ass needs to get her butt into gear, because someone would like to fit on all of the rides and not sweat like a pig just walking out to the bus stop. I need to start working harder though, on relay for life stuff. Because before I know it the weekend will be upon us and I will be scrambling to finish my tasks. I must film and post a new video today. I am so freak'en behind on that stuff its silly.

my eyes droop but there is so much excitement behind them

its warm out finally. i am so happy. i'm wearing my cut up jeans that i turned into capri's and two tank tops layered over each other. my nails are painted, my toes are painted. i cannot wait for this school day to be over so i can jet home and play with my dog. although i need to stop off at the house to grab my suit case then go to the puppy. i'm excited to hang out with juliet this saturday. we are going to have an absolutely have an amazing time. perhaps sam will join us as well. i still have 3 videos to script and all of them to write. i think i'll do a majority of shooting this weekend. i am getting my hair cut this week and my nails and toes done professionally. sort of nervous about going to a new salon but i need o be able to trust my hairdresser to make me look good. i love my hair but its getting out of control...

the sun, my insparation has come to my presents again

when i was little i would beg my mother to take me to the library every week so i may have grabbed a bag full of books and sat outside in my favorite tree and read for hours. but now a hobby i once enjoyed so much has now been reduced to torcher because all i do is read for school. i want to read my kind of books not the kind of books that lack plot or passion. okay maybe i tend to gravitate to the young adult books but at least those are entertaining and yes they are easy to read. but who wants a book that you have a mental break down trying to figure out what the author is saying.

apparently, i am now an overachiever when it comes to youtube. i have scripted 3 out of 7 videos i have come up with in the last day and half. 5 out of that 7 is a multiple part project, one is my w.w. video and the other is going to be a video called five guilty pleasures. ugh so much to do and film. but i will prevail oh and not to forget school. that ends this month. so glad!

so i am doing something completely different. i should be thrilled i think i am but, its the finding how other take it that i am worried for. but as i have stated before this year is all about shaking stuff up and doing what i really want, but this is the weird part. i have no idea. its kinda of amazingly refreshing to think that my future as of right now is a big white open space. to be filled by my choices. much like this box was before i began to type in helavetica. i just have to make it until april 27th then i am offically done with this place. i think the only thing i will miss is this computer desk and this computer desk...yeah thats all i will miss. the gym was nice though. im just so happy with this choice

hello there sunshine

So, to be completely honest with myself and I guess whoever else reads this. I am reinventing who I am.
I am purging the sloth and skank from my life. I am doing more, experiencing new things, reaching out, and finding new people outside of my little bubble to spend time with. I want more from my life and as corny as it sounds, life is insanely short and a very rough ride at times. I truly think it took me to hit what I call my bottom of the barrel for me to finally go out and do what I want and pursue who I think I should be. opinions of others who don't really know me be damned. I know I have more to offer to the world than an imprint on a chair. I am going to be something truly incredible. And I am going to seize ever opportunity that doesn't sound inherently dangerous and life threatening. I am going to dance, party, and work hard.
New life motos:
Remember the concept of less is more
Classy-sexy not skanky sexy
Work hard-Play hard

new music and tootsie pops

I am updating to do from my glass and steel desk. I am wearing my Gumby boxers and my boys flannel hoodie from rue 21. After a very tossy-turny sleep last night I am left with this feeling of unproductiveness. Like the feeling that today I will do just enough to get me by and do the things I simply must do, i.e. the list that my mother undoubtedly left for me downstairs, remaking my bed and my homework for Wednesday. I have so much more to say but I don't think I am ready to make any of this completely public yet, I am still processing.

Current nail polish: Courtney orange by sinful colors

Come on use your big girl voice.

I am sitting in my 8 a.m. history class, with what I like to call Worlds Quietest Monotone Professor or W.Q.M.P for short. This is the type of class where as long as you do the reading you really don't need to go to the class. But in order for me too turn my new leaf I am not allowing myself to miss a single class all semester baring being deathly ill or family crisis. After I go home and shower I am going to start working on my latest video project. I have already done a rough run of it on paper. But single spaced hand written it was 2.5 pages long. I talk fast and all but I am trying to stick to some rules for myself. For example: My video will not exceed four minutes. Yes, its a nerdfighter rule but I agree with it, whenever a video is longer than four minutes I have to push myself to actually spend time watching it. Another rule is that I will not participate in the ritual of cramming 10,000 jump cuts into a video, I mean it works for most people but I would much rather have one smooth take. I mean if I need to edit mistakes out that's one thing. Or if I choose to do a video where the two sides of my brain talk to each other, this would be another exception to the rule. I would to like to participate in V.E.D.A this year, and actually make it all the way through. This also means that I would have my Mac by then too. I actually really hope to have it by the end of February or at least to have bought it by then.
I join weight watchers next week, I am nervous but I also know this is the best thing I could possibly do for myself right now. I need to take care of this growing weight problem..ha ha Do you see the pun I made there...wow I am so funny. I will post my video up here when I finish it. I plan on putting it on Facebook, Youtube, Livejoural and blogspot. Ahh this is exposing myself to everyone. It's scary but I have a feeling it will be worth it.

Happy 2010 self. let's make it better...mk?